Sunday, September 30, 2012

Yes or NO

Soccer game was a loss.
0-2 on a turf field.
They weren't playing fast enough for turf.
Turf is fast and ball bounces high and crazy.
They lost.
It was a long ride home from a very mad girl ranting and raving.
 I found out I made a non-friend today.
Apparently if I don't give a ride to her girl who my girl does not get along with I am a bad person.
I am not a doormat.
I have bend over backwards for quite a while now.
Don't have children and put them in activities if you can not get them there.
Her husband works in Afghanistan as a civilian.
That's a choice and it isn't my job to always pick up and take care of your kid because you chose that.
I like spending time 1 on 1 with LN or with people I like at least.
I'm mean I'm told.
I was raised with a guilty complex.
Always put everyone 1st but you was the motto I was taught by.
I learned well.
Another Mom who is a friend  told me to STOP.
She reminded me it's not my responsibility.
I know that but I hate to say no if I can say yes.
I am putting myself 1st or at least my kid 1st.
At least for a day or 2 before I haul another player to next weekends tournament with LN and me.
Oh well I do like her, she's a good kid and listens to me.
So much for self promotion.

Saturday, September 29, 2012


LN had top soccer today. Her travel team had a "play" date with mentally challenged kids.
She loves it and has fun with them.
Afterwards we went to local diner with 2 other families for lunch.
I brought 2 extras home with me.
I forgot what it's like with more than 1 kid in the house.
Giggles, squeals, laughter, screams, noise and  sound, oh my
One of girls is OCD about cleaning.
She came to the wrong house.
She also is scared of big dogs.
Should I keep quiet on fact he's a pit bull?
That's what I thought.
The 2 girls who came home with us are development girls and don't get farm (albeit small one) life.
They were bored.
They played Twister.
Funny game..
I took them for Blizzards at DQ.
Good time was had by all.
Tomorrow they play another undefeated travel soccer team.
Crossing fingers and toes because it'll be a long ride home from King of Prussia if they lose.
Cool fallish night tonight means...
Time for knitting and vegging with my girl while watching Big Bang reruns.
I am a convert to Sheldon and Leonard.
Comfy Saturday Night All!

Thursday, September 27, 2012


It doesn't feel fallish today.
It's sticky humid and sun is beating down.
I live across the Chesapeake Bay from Aberdeen MD.
I hear loud "thunder" regularly but today is bad.
It actually is tests that are sonic booms from the Proving Grounds over there.
I'm always curious what, why, where  and how.
Today it's why so many in a row?
I'm more aware since Sept. 11 attacks of the airbase activities locally in Dover
which I am less than 5 miles from and regionally in Aberdeen.
Probably routine but I'm aware and watching.
The week after 9/11 was crazy around here with the morgue being in Dover.
I saw the helicopters fly low over my house with the victims remains.
The air and sky were clear except those helicopters.
Makes me think, learn and remember.
Yesterday the fighter jets from Dover were flying maneuvers over us.
It takes me time to find the jets that match the roar I hear when they are outflying the sounds.
The weather is right today to carry the sounds from across the bay.
Locally our fire school is having classes because I can see the black smoke from their
test fires. It's only 5 mi away.
They go through thousands of straw bales a local farmer supplies annually that they burn in tests.
Weird all the little things you learn about if you pay attention to details.
Oblivious I ain't some times I should be but mostly it helps with my quest of knowledge.
I've always wanted to know more but am not "smart" as they say.
Common sense is it's own form of smart.
My kind of smart.
Ask me some questions in science I'm lost and I frankly don't care.
I don't do names either. I skip over small words in books.
I think like a computer in that I sort info coming in quickly and reject useless back out.
Only problem is what is useless is interpretation and I fail there.
I'm trying to absorb more and reject less.
Work in progress always...

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Truth or Dare

Truth or Dare!
Who has opened flour canister to bake or cook with and found it with a web over the top from weevil?

Truth or Dare!
Who has  removed the weevil web and used the flour underneath anyhow and not told anyone?

I'm just asking.
 Little paper thin pests are not nice and have no point except to annoy me.
Most flour stays in the freezer and comes out 5# at a time but I have a full up issue in my 2 freezers.

The half of a hog and whole lamb are butchered and ensconced in freezers with
rest of beef, frozen veggies and processed crapola S buys.

We will never go hungry. Ever. Ever.
I have a generator to keep it going in power outages so we can feed the world.
LN's friends think it's cool we have alot of food.
No we weren't raised in the depression or starved as kids.
We just don't like to eat processed meat so we raise our own and freeze garden veggies for same reasons.

Tomorrow I am driving 100 miles south into Virginia.
My 86 yr old ,doesn't drive, Mom-n-law would like me to take her to lunch in VA to see a friend.
The friend is from Georgia and won't be any closer than VA.
They haven't seen each other in 5 years or more.
So off I go to Onely, VA to find a diner so 2 old friends can unite.
Pretty cool, hard to say no.

Do you think LN needs a 12 step program?
These are a few of her socks. I think she should stop being so conservative.
Branch out a little into colors.
So somber don't you think?

Monday, September 24, 2012

Happy 22

Today begins a new year for my son as he turns 22 yrs old.
Happy Birthday Big Guy!

You rock my world .
I Love You Son.
You took 26 hours to arrive after my water broke but
it was a mellow labor and delivery until last few hours.
Deliveried you at home with just me and midwife and your grandad snoring in the other room.
Good experience even with umbilical cord breaking open into a geyser.
The next 22 yrs have been more laborious and interesting.
I wouldn't trade most of it for the world.
Most of it!
Thanks for keeping me real and challenging me and my set ways.


Saturday, September 22, 2012


It's 5 years tonight that my world was knocked for a major loop.
A person I knew and had as a customer drove drunk and tried to take away 2 of my crowning jewels.
My girls and I were driving home from a dinner celebrating my friends 25th anniversary.
We headed home bout an hour away when he came at us on an S curve doing 60 mph.
He never turned the corner and
This was R's week old new to her Focus.
This was where R sat in the passenger seat with LN laying down asleep with seatbelt on in the back.
R was on her phone to a friend in Montana laughing. I saw him coming.
It had lots of airbags that they say saved us.
The roof and doors were removed by the jaws of life .
2 helicopters flew me & R an hour away to trauma unit.
2 ambulances took LN and him to area hospital.
He was then sent to my hospital.
This was my seat on drivers side.
The white truck in the background was his ;/
Was it worth being 3 times the limit drunk?
It wasn't our fault or his family's either.
He chose to drink at various places all day and drive.
I hold the ones he visited and drank with responsible to some degree.
I can't look or talk with neighbor he drank with before heading south.
But ultimately he chose to do get drunk and drive.
State Police investigator said not to call it an accident, it was a wreck.
Accident are unintentional.
Do I care he died a few hours later laying in the trauma unit beside my gurney?
No I do not but I wish he would have stayed alive so I could have made him feel what my girls went thorough before I ended his miserable alcoholic life .
All those phrases about not drinking and driving aren't enough.
They don't listen and won't stop.
I have a recovering alcoholic friend who set me straight on that issue.
I am reminded each step I take and each time I see R's scars what he did.
When LN is scared to try something or gasps when someone drives too close I know.
We healed as well as possible.
I still hear R's screams and LN's call from her hospital an hour away begging to see me and knowing I couldn't get there.
He died.
R and my personalities changed sometimes for worse, sometimes better.
Never the same.
I am grateful each day he didn't succeed.
We must have had better angels.
I thank God every day.

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Sorting and Knitting

Last night was gorgeous. S was at livestock auction and LN's travel practice was canceled.
The field they practice on every wed and fri nights was saturated from heavy rains.
The association wanted to let fields dry out so they are decent for this weekends games.
As a result I had a free-er night to ...
Knit a scarf. I'm still learning to knit and using cool knobby yarn.
I have ripped it out and started again with just knit stitch.
I had knit 1 row, purl 1 row before but it wasn't visible or easy to keep track of so rip away.
And start again. The colors are bad but my point and click isn't up for night time shots.
I need a new camera but like portability of small click and shoot.
I've seen Nikon 1 and 2 's listed with different lens available but still small sized.
They seem a good alternative to bigger cameras or cheap point and clicks.
Anyone have an opinion out there? 
Please help a sister out if you do.
Santa might bring me one.
I also started a sort on big tote of craft supplies a friend cleaned out of garage.
Alot of wooden pieces but don't great quantities of any uniform sizes.
Their thoughts were I could use them in 4-H club to do crafts with.
There was beads and pipe cleaners I already am planning on  using for Christmas hospital tray favors.
This pile has iron on embroidery emblems. Again not enough for whole club but possible if
a few kids are creative on pillows or ???
This smaller tote is just pompoms. All colors and sizes.
Maybe tray favors also.
I don't know yet but sorting and ziploc bagging everything with likes will be time consuming.
They also gave me small glass bowls and votive holders.
My minds in a whirl with Santa crafts possibly?
Hmmmmm.... I wonder?

Wednesday, September 19, 2012


After a monumental cleaning of LN's room she came downstairs in
this getup of "rediscovered" treasures.
Yes she is sporting flip flop/legwarmers her bro-n-law gave her for Christmas 2 yrs ago.
The legwarmers are permanently attached to the flip flops.
I just am so proud of her fashion sense.
This deserved a 2nd post of the day to share my joy.
Goose, our pit is equally impressed.


You see I have a monkey on my back.
I am a Coke addict.
I fight it hard but it is a stress reliever, a cooling break and I love them .
There are bad for my teeth, my body, my weight, my life.
Some days I do better than others.
This week I am consiously trying to not buy any unless I eat out.
I try to eat out at local place that doesn't serve Coke only Pepsi which I hate.
I do not buy cases for my home, I only buy singles if I stop at store or to eat.
I'm trying, I'm human, I love them.
Don't tell me just to stop , I do, I go weeks and months without them.
Stress is directly related to need for them which is a telling sign.
 I should destress but HE  the cause wont take the hint.
So not funny but again necessary to laugh about it for awhile yet.
Oh how I miss it.
What's worse I collect Coke "stuff" .
I have huge sign that hung outside place in PA that I loved to get real old fashioned subs
with the wooden long picks in it to hold it together.
I have little mirrors and magnets and advertisments as well.
I need to put them away.
But I love it!
On a side note I turned idiot box on at 8:00 pm last night to see what was on.
I had been reading before that, a Iris Johansen book, real good.
I flipped through 60 channels and nada, nothing, zip, zilch on.
I started to watch something I didn't even like.
When I realized that I turned it off and read till 10:00pm.
Lights out should have been earlier but better than mindless show I didn't even like.
It's a start.
Down with the monkeys!

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

More Waiting

More waiting today with my MIL
There is NOTHING wrong with her heart.
When she had her leg amputated she spiked high on blood pressure for a few days after surgery.
Go Figure!
She was over 80 yr old.
So for last few years every 6 months the blood sucking heart doctor brings her in
and says "you're fine".
It's gotta be a scam to charge medicare/blue cross and other insurance companies.
She won't stop going because she was raised to believe doctors are honest caregivers
that wouldn't do that.
I disagree but chauffeur away only complaining to cyber space.
I even took her out to lunch afterwards for her 3.00 hotdog with onions and mustard
without uttering "ewwww ,yuck ,do you know what thats made of?"
Oh well it was a raining day anyhow so what else could I possible do?
Dishes, wash eggs, fold laundry, vacuum, clean, water cows, etc, etc,etc.
My husband did switch out some things on our 2 campers readying the  older one for auction.
He pressure washed it and switched out jacks.
I had hard time with the new camper jack cranking up.
Might be mean but whoever buys old camper can deal with it.
I swept inside and held parts he was bolting on or off like gofer.
I'll be glad if it sells and doesn't return.
My fingers are crossed and toes.
LN was really mad when I picked her up from field hockey tonight.
She was told by her coach to hand over her size adult small uniform to a tiny 6th grader who received an adult medium but should have been in a childs size.
She said it wasn't fair since she wasn't given the same options in 6th or 7th grade and
 had to wear large uniforms each time.
I asked her to consider her feelings both times and the girl's today.
The girl would have swam in the big size and did LN want her unhappy as well?
Wouldn't it look good in picking of captain to find out you gave it up as well?
She was grouchy for quite while about it too.
She understood but was upset because she actually helped pick out and order uniforms with the coach and was happy that finally after 3 seasons hers would fit.
Lesson learned albeit a little grumpily.
She's a good kid and eventually said at least she liked the girl she exchanged with and was glad the girl was on her team.
LN has been chosen for the People to People trip next year.
We have to go to interest meeting next month.
I am not sure why she was chosen or what it's all about.
I've heard it's expensive so I'm reining in LN's excitement with those thoughts.
 I also am not sure I wanna let her go to Australia for 17 days without me around.
She is responsible but for once I am not comfortable with my kid going on a trip.

Monday, September 17, 2012

288 and 8

288 pages read in...
8 hours I spent with MIL today
I read a few magazines in the waiting rooms as well as 288 pages of my book.
I sorta mighta tore out some craft pages in 1 magazine maybe.
Is that wrong? I am unsure if it is. I asked once a few years ago and was told by receptionist she didn't care but haven't asked since. I just keep using her permission. 
My MIL doesn't drive anymore so I chauffeur her to appts.
Today she scheduled a 9:30 and 2:30 appts.
Awkward time frame to get anything done or make drive back home in a timely fashion.
It was frustrating to sit for an hour at the foot doctors office before she was seen for 10 min.
It was more frustrating to wait another hour this afternoon at ear doctor again for 10 min.
In the middle of doc appts I took her to local restaurant since she doesn't get out of house except for doctors offices or friday night dinner and after read on her sofa
 as she did a crossword puzzle till next appt.
Then I sat at middle school waiting on LN's practice to end for 45 min.
A whole lotta waiting and reading can be tiring.
I was people staring watching at 2nd appt in amazement.
I could not believe the rudeness of people in the waiting rooms.
One paced and was agitated he had to wait in line. He loudly stated how dumb it was and he wasn't gonna stand for it. He was not alone either there were others.
I witnessed 2 family disputes and heard more about others personal issues shall I say.
I did take advantage of the fact that I stayed in town and brought home pizza.
What a rip off price wise but so easy after not thawing anything from freezer since...
I wasn't home all day.
So wash didn't get hung up either and the sky is showing a storm now.
How hard could it be to hang up 1 load of laundry and pull meat from freezer?
I wonder ...
but I 'm not going there.
I think I need to go to sleep earlier than usual.
Boob tube is damaging my brain.
I watch too much mindless crapola at night.
New page turning over I swear.

Sunday, September 16, 2012


It's been a good day.
Started day with an early game of travel soccer.
8:00 am warm up time with 9:00 am game time with heavy dew is not conducive to soccer.
LN's team was home this week so no major early time.
7:00 am wasn't too early to get up.
They won 1-0 and had a competitive game.
Her team didn't play exceptionally well but pulled it off .
Afterward we went out to brunch with 2 other families.
There were 8 of us (S slept in and didn't come) so we took 2 tables with 3 girls at one.
The waitress took adults and then girls orders. I ordered tuna fish and so did LN w/o us comparing.
Great minds and all, we love tuna.
Next was quick stop at home to get supplies and off to 4-H to work on litter barrel and window display with club members.
Sometimes too many helpers is not a good thing.
Chaos ensues and not as much gets done as you would expect.
But good that they came to help.
The 4-H year starts Sept 1st and always begins strong, weakening as it continues.
This was LN's artwork of a dog head in ground throwing debris and trash up into can.
The message is:
Clean up with 4-H
No Bones about it!
We ll see how it flies as we try to attach "trash" to can where dog is sending it.
I think some chalk ought to hold a crushed pop can and water bottle, etc. to side of can doncha think?
Yesterday we cleaned the beach. It was chilly and breezy as we left home but cleared off enough for girls to be barefoot as they picked up trash.
Of course silliness ensued there as well when they posed for picture taking.
Silly girls.
Nice weekend all and all.
Think I'm going to head to neighbors to watch some football.

Friday, September 14, 2012


It's a ho hum day.
Temperature is rising again but only to low 80*.
LN has field hockey after school.
The coach should name varsity and cuts today.
Fingers and toes crossed?
Ahh it'll be alright.
She's got this!
Tonight is travel soccer practice.
Tomorrow is Clean the Beach for 4-H community service.
Tomorrow afternoon is naptime.
Sunday morning it travel soccer gametime.
I need groceries.
Staples refills, fresh stuff too...
Hey let's go back to naptime.
I need to get a personal trainer.
I need motivation.
Home training isn't working.
Lifting 100# feed bags in my feed store isn't doing it either.
I need shaped!
I'm not liking over 40 body.
It's time to train.
Whose with me?
Show of hands?
Fine then I'll leave you with  Delaware beach picture.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

September 11th

Always Remember, Never Forget
 The Twin Towers, PA field & Pentagon so many gave their lives.
 Rescue Workers, Policemen, Firefighters, Citizens off the street, many who died that day and more
who died after with residual effects of the damaging environment that day.
Always Remember, Never Forget

Sunday, September 9, 2012


LN's team Union won their 1st game of the official fall travel season 6-1.
LN scored 1st goal in the 1st game of the season from defense.
Nope no picture of it cause I forgot big camera which is film anyway.
My point and click is digital but doesn't come close to zoom.
See what I mean? Yep that's her bracing to run which ever way she's needed.
Squint if you have too.
She scored on a foul kick from outside the 18 yd line by probably 10 more yards I'd guess.
She said she was aiming for a girl standing on the 6 yr line but hit it to hard.
Oops and a score.
Pleasant day, great cool 75* weather with slight breeze.
All around good day.
I put a roast in the crockpot with potatoes before I left so I put frozen bag of peas
on when I returned and tada - dinner.
My kinda meal prep.
I'm thinking an early night to enjoy sleeping weather.
Good Night.


Just checking in on a beautiful Sunday.
That monster storm was a bust here.
We had rain and some wind but it moved so fast it was unclimatic.
Is that a word?
LN & I were about 17 mi. south working on a 4-H project where heavy rain soaked us moving from vehicle to building.
Before we left home the rain was just starting and after we returned there wasn't even usual puddles in driveways low spots.
Much hype about nada but that's fine.
The great thing is it cooled to 70* and NO HUMIDITY.
Sleeping windows wide open was great.
A light quilt to snuggle under was better than the stale air of air conditioner.
It is supposed to be in 70* maybe 80* during the days and
60* at night this week.
I'm chilling on the sofa with windows up and blessed quiet of the morning with no air conditioner.
It's the small things actually that make the world spin.
LN & I are headed to her 1st travel soccer game of the fall travel season today.
It's 1 1/2 hours away in the more hilly area north of DE right over border into PA.
She's been running last 3 school days at least a mile a day in field hockey try outs so she's feeling more in shape than other seasons.
It's a harder division in soccer with out one of her best teammates who moved on to better things.
The coach doesn't feel there is drama and separation on the team that affects their playing
it's as obvious as the nose on our faces of the parents.
I'll see how it goes but have my doubts.
LN is playing wing when coach feels defense can spare her.
At wing she has strong leg but players that should be sending her the ball don't, so she's a waste.
Hopefully with 2 new girls she may find a serious enough player to send it to her leg.
She can cross the goal if striker waits there to knock it in.
Simple logistics.
I'm not saying my kids the best on the team.
She is just capable of putting it where it needs to be to allow someone to score.
I believe parents ought to be honest about their kids and their abilities.
I can and do admit my brats faults.
This AIN'T one of them ;]~
Have a great Sunday!


Saturday, September 8, 2012

It's Coming

It's coming thank goodness.
High winds, cold front, hail, tornado watch, yeah!
Humidity will be severely blown outta here.
I'm waiting with bated breath.
Seriously I want fall weather.
I'm melting...I'm melting...I'm melting...

I have to shut down computer before it comes just in case.
I'll be back with update hopefully in a sweatshirt and jeans ;]

We took the sheep to the breeder this morning who we borrowed ram from.
She needed him back to cover hers and we had some still open.
We sent feed and hay with them as the drought has fried her pastures.
Splitting up the ewes with 2 rams will hopefully give us better coverage sooner than later.
I want little lambs , there's nothing cuter.
Goats are still out being bred as well.
That only leaves cows minus steer who went to butcher  and a horse here.
With sweet corn still on wagons for cows to free choice chores are 2 minutes long
unless water troughs need filled.
Cows are getting so much moisture from corn, troughs are lasting longer.

Friday, September 7, 2012

Feast or Famine

Not 1 but 2 posts today...
Yeah me.
See what happens when I turn on computer instead of Kindle.

I have to mow my pasture yard and I'm putting it off since it's hot, humid and wayyyy toooo long.
Think I'm kidding?

Told you so and this was after fair but it is same or higher now.
Too many rainy days when I had time and a few days it never dried out from humidity.
I ll see what happens.

Waiting for grass to dry I made Banana Black Walnut Muffins.
We seem to never keep bananas before they go over ripe so I make these alot.

Think this pan has seen a few bakings?
I jacked it from my Dad's when I moved into my 1st place.
He never knew because he didn't bake. It was left from Mom who ran out on us years before.

Last picture, this is what I bought LN for her 13th birthday present.

A Gyro Bowl for toddlers just like on commercials.
She has been asking for it everytime she sees it on TV.
She was so excited.
She tried to spill everything she put it but couldn't.
Not bad for simple gift huh?

Doesn't take much to amuse my kids.
She also was allowed to go shopping at outlets so don't feel I cheaped out on her.

Blame it on Kindle

I blame less blog posts on my Kindle.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
I have great ideas for posts but ...
I grab my Kindle to check e-mails, read blogs I follow and of course read.
Kindle will NOT let me post however.
Apparently it is not compatible with blogger.
I can read 3 posts updates at a sitting but can't scroll list and can't post.
Kinda like all the other "modern" conveniences we have :/
Are they really saving us time?
I don't think so. I think they makes me lazier.
Like laundry detergent and dryers.
LN rearranged her room and "found" laundry last night as well as regular laundry.
This morning I threw a load in but remembered I needed to make another
batch of detergent so I spent at least 10 min. doing that.
I proceeded to start her load and went about my day.
But 1st I had to decide what she would need to wear in the next few days
versus  can it wait but needs washed.
Reason- I don't have dryer and haven't for 5 years.
I didn't use it except in emergencies before that.
Emergency= my stepson visits and needs laundry NOW for return trip.
Now I have to plan ahead and consider drying time.
Take yesterday for example, rain, glorious rain made drying the 2 loads impossible.
Not impossible but inconvenient.
I had to break out the drying racks I use in winter and rearrange to set up.
I also hung the unmentionables up on the covered back porch as well as few shirts.
Most things were dry last night or this morning. I just have to fold them ;/
Different post .
Dryers make us lazy.
Or "in the moment" people I think.
Instant gratifiction.
LN never gets to tell me at 10:00 pm on a school night that she NEEDS such and such washed.
It just doesn't happen.
We do fine too. I've raise multiple kids playing multiple sports and never had to miss a game or match because their uniform wasn't clean or there.
And I don't drive forgotten items to school.
Remember your stuff.
I'm mean Mama!
Long rambling way to say...
It's Kindles fault I don't post more.
As I go about my day I grab it to check up but can't or don't ( because Kindles there)
take the time to boot computer and post.
I'm sorry. I'm going to do better and resist laziness option.
I'm opting out I hope. Cross your fingers.
Do wanna clarify I don't buy books on my Kindle.
I only read free downloadable books.
I can not justify buying when the library is so close to me and free.
This was a gift I didn't ask for because of that reason.
I love it as long as it's free though.

Sunday, September 2, 2012

My Soul

I love him.
He hurts my heart.
He is protective, witty, loyal to the death.
He is handsome, annoying as sin, full of life.
He's made mistakes.
He's a product of me.
I see as I age myself in him and my Dad.
My Dad hung the moon.
My son keeps it in the sky.
I love him.

I tear up as I hear him coming.
I hold it in cause he hates to see the emotion.
I let it out as he leaves.

Each of my kids evokes a different emotion in me.
He is my soul.