Although I'm blessed to be a Mom to a few kiddos
this day depresses me greatly.
It's Happy Mother's Day but I haven't had a Mom in forever.
Oh she's alive , she's just not present in my life and hasn't been since I was a little girl.
{Yes I know sister if you're reading this you disagree but it's my opinion and it's based on facts}
Mom decided I was too independent at a young age (like 5) and she didn't like that.
As a result she wrote me off.
We lived in the same house till I was about 16 but not closely.
I can't remember a time when I wasn't independent because I had to be.
Kind of a catch 22 ya know?
I'm told I need to forgive her for my sake.
I don't agree.
I don't feel the need to spend my energy forgiving or forgetting her.
Better to learn and guard myself is my thoughts.
It's sad I should have this dilemma as a adult but worse as a young girl.
It has made me a harder person than my siblings who let her coddle them at will.
Guess it's my fault then?
Bull stuff to that.
I learned from this to change the cycle with my kids.
We always say "I'm never going to be my parents".
Well in this I am not nor will ever allow myself to be this to my kids.
Kids do not asked to be born nor treated badly as minors.
Woman up and act your age as parents and do right by your kids.
My thoughts on this fake Hallmark holiday.
Well, I know it's not the current politically correct way to be . . . choosing not to forgive someone in your life for their actions . . . but some hurts go too deep. The wonderful thing that has come from an unfortunate situation is that you have chosen to be a supportive, kind, caring, loving mother who is providing your kids with what you didn't have. I think it takes a very strong person to do that. Sending hugs to you on this day. (But no Hallmark card. ;o])
ReplyDelete(((((Lisa)))) Sending hugs and a Happy Mother's Day.
ReplyDeleteMy husband's mother wasn't/isn't much of a "mother" either so I know how you feel. She is still alive (87) but he has cut all ties with her and her manipulative ways.
ReplyDeleteBUT happy Mother's Day to YOU, it sounds like your kids are well loved and supported!